Disorders of the Modern World
Indiscreet Autobiography Exposure Anxiety
The ever-present worry that someone you know will figure out you’ve been writing inappropriate things about them on your blog.
Vocal Pre-Release Apprehension
The uncontrollable fanguish that flows from the realisation that a beloved programme/comic/toy from one’s childhood is being remade.
Post-Observation Capitulation
The calming acceptance that the remake isn’t as bad as it could have been/is actually quite good/is way better than the original which, while misremembered as a golden slice of genius, actually stinks to high heaven.
Divertisement Disclosure Disquietude
A reluctance to admit to work colleagues that you engage in socially unacceptable past times, i.e. comic convention attendance.
Temporal Obfuscation-related Disequilibrium
The dizzying terror experienced when you realise your boss has been subjecting your somewhat fudged timesheet to intense scrutiny
Interface Lethargia
The gap in processing speed between your super-slick home computing platform and the piece of shit Windows NT machine provided in the workplace.
Compulsive Frontal Lobe Palpation
The uncontrollable urge to pound your head against your desk.
